News

Welcome to our Oregon News category, where we bring you the latest and most relevant news stories from the beautiful state of Oregon. From the stunning Pacific coastline to the rugged Cascade Mountains, Oregon is home to a wealth of natural beauty, diverse communities, and exciting cultural events.

Weirdo Boldly Reads Newspaper in Public Instead of Mindlessly Doomscrolling Like the Rest of Us

PORTLAND, OR — In a bizarre scene that left passersby unsettled, a local weirdo was spotted yesterday morning sitting alone on a park bench downtown, openly reading a physical newspaper instead of doomscrolling his phone like a normal, emotionally fragile person. Eyewitnesses reported that the man...

Sad: Loser Photographer Just Needs to Give it Up, Because Let’s Be Honest His Work is Trash

Roseburg, OR — In a heartbreaking but entirely predictable development, local Roseburg man Tyler McMannis reportedly spent yet another weekend wandering Oregon’s scenic trails, clinging desperately to his Canon EOS camera like it wasn’t already over for him. Witnesses spotted McMannis near the...

Oregon Named Best State To Raise A Little Free-Range Anarchist With A Trust Fund

PORTLAND, OR — In news that surprised absolutely no one and disappointed absolutely everyone’s grandparents, Oregon has officially been named the best state to raise a little free-range anarchist with a trust fund. The groundbreaking report, issued by the National Institute for Highly Specific...

Prineville Proudly Becomes First Sanctuary City for Straight White Men

PRINEVILLE, OR — In a historic move celebrated by men who still know how to change a tire, Prineville has officially declared itself the first Sanctuary City for Straight White Men in Oregon — and maybe the last safe place left west of Idaho. The resolution, passed unanimously on April 24, comes...

80s Babies Rejoice As ‘From A Hose’ Bottled Water Finally Hits Store Shelves

U.S. — In a move hailed as “the greatest beverage innovation since Tang,” Crystal Stream announced today the release of their new limited-edition bottled water flavor, “From A Hose,” sending shockwaves of nostalgia through millions of Americans born in the 1980s. The product promises to deliver...
Oregon Announces Free Fishing Right After Turkey Day

Oregon Announces Free Fishing Right After Turkey Day

In a recent announcement, the Oregon Wildlife and Fisheries Department declared a special opportunity for outdoor enthusiasts in Oregon. Following the Thanksgiving holiday, the state will host complimentary fishing days. From November 24th to 25th, fishing enthusiasts...

The Most Common Birds In Oregon (A Helpful Guide)

The Most Common Birds In Oregon (A Helpful Guide)

Oregon, a haven for bird enthusiasts, is home to a diverse array of Oregon birds, from the vibrant Western Tanager to the stealthy Swainson’s Thrush. With this rich diversity comes the responsibility to promote bird conservation and ensure these beautiful creatures...

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