News

Welcome to our Oregon News category, where we bring you the latest and most relevant news stories from the beautiful state of Oregon. From the stunning Pacific coastline to the rugged Cascade Mountains, Oregon is home to a wealth of natural beauty, diverse communities, and exciting cultural events.

Uh Oh: Eugene Man Shocked to Learn Constitution Still Has That Gun Thing In It

EUGENE, OR — Local part-time kombucha brewer Jasper Willow-Breeze experienced what experts are calling "acute textual trauma" this week after skimming a pocket Constitution and discovering the Second Amendment is still in there. “I thought we deleted that back in like, the 90s,” said...

This Isn’t Satire: Eugene Man Arrested After Threats With Gun-Shaped Bong in Grocery Store Parking Lot

You’d be forgiven for thinking this was another one of our ridiculous headlines—because “man with rifle-shaped bong triggers full police response” sounds straight out of satire. But nope. This one’s 100% real, Oregon. On Friday afternoon, May 2, police in Eugene responded to a report around 12:21...

Portland Solves Downtown Drug Crisis Instantly With Bold New ‘Drug-Free Zone’ Signs

PORTLAND, OR — In a stunning turn of events, downtown Portland’s decades-long struggle with open-air drug use has officially ended—thanks to a bold new policy initiative: putting up a lot of signs. Lining the street like hopeful little soldiers, a series of “DRUG-FREE ZONE” signs now boldly mark...

Trump Proposes New Holidays: ‘We’re the Best Day’ and ‘Other Countries Are Losers Day’

PALM BEACH, FL — In a late-night post on Truth Social sandwiched between rants about wind turbines and the deep state, former President Donald Trump announced a bold new plan to reshape the American holiday calendar by adding two new national holidays: “We’re the Best Day” and “Other Countries Are...

Portland Protesters Demand More Things to Protest

PORTLAND, OR — In a surprising show of unity, hundreds of Portland protesters gathered downtown Tuesday not to decry a specific issue, but to demand more things to be upset about. “Frankly, we’re running out,” said protester Kai Evergreen, who held a blank cardboard sign in silent defiance. “We’ve...
OSP Warns of ‘Armed and Dangerous’ Suspect in Oregon

OSP Warns of ‘Armed and Dangerous’ Suspect in Oregon

Update: BREAKING NEWS-Just released from the Harney County Sheriff's Office, suspect that was involved in yesterday's high speed vehicle chase which started in Salt Lake City, Utah has been caught. We will update when more information becomes available. (via Elkhorn...

Satellite Images Capture Ravages of Oregon Wildfires

Satellite Images Capture Ravages of Oregon Wildfires

The Oregon wildfires have now made national news as the Cedar Creek Fire, which has quadrupled in size, is one of 21 fires currently burning in Oregon. According to NPR, the Cedar ACreek Wildfire is said to be the largest currently ablaze. Space.com recently posted...

Portland Sued for Homeless Encampments Blocking Sidewalks

Portland Sued for Homeless Encampments Blocking Sidewalks

Ten Portlanders filed a class action lawsuit against the city September 6, alleging that the homeless encampments blocking the sidewalk violate the Americans with Disabilities Act. If successful, the lawsuit could force the city's hand in providing a much-needed,...

Update: Mill Fire In Weed California Now Over 3,921 Acres

Update: Mill Fire In Weed California Now Over 3,921 Acres

Yesterday the Mill fire raged through parts of Weed California, destroying many homes and prompting evacuations in Weed, Lake Shastina, Grenada, and other nearby areas. Today the fire is over 3,921 acres, and 20 percent contained. California recently secured a FEMA...

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