News

Welcome to our Oregon News category, where we bring you the latest and most relevant news stories from the beautiful state of Oregon. From the stunning Pacific coastline to the rugged Cascade Mountains, Oregon is home to a wealth of natural beauty, diverse communities, and exciting cultural events.

Oregon Lawmakers Introduce Bill to Ban Duck Hunt Zapper: “No Civilian Needs an Orange Plastic Firearm”

SALEM, OR — In a move critics are calling “a bold leap backward,” Oregon lawmakers behind controversial gun control Measure 114 have now set their sights on a new threat: the 1985 Nintendo Zapper. Dubbed Measure 114½, the proposed legislation would ban the sale, possession, and inheritance of the...

Busy Mom of 3 Recommends New Meth-Infused Energy Drink “No Sketchy Sweeteners, Just Pure Speed”

GRANTS PASS, OR — In today’s chaotic world of sugar crashes, artificial additives, and PTO meetings that never end, one Oregon mother says she’s found the perfect solution: meth. Specifically, Mountain Meth — a bold new energy drink that skips the synthetic sweeteners, avoids caffeine entirely,...

Uh Oh: Eugene Man Shocked to Learn Constitution Still Has That Gun Thing In It

EUGENE, OR — Local part-time kombucha brewer Jasper Willow-Breeze experienced what experts are calling "acute textual trauma" this week after skimming a pocket Constitution and discovering the Second Amendment is still in there. “I thought we deleted that back in like, the 90s,” said...

This Isn’t Satire: Eugene Man Arrested After Threats With Gun-Shaped Bong in Grocery Store Parking Lot

You’d be forgiven for thinking this was another one of our ridiculous headlines—because “man with rifle-shaped bong triggers full police response” sounds straight out of satire. But nope. This one’s 100% real, Oregon. On Friday afternoon, May 2, police in Eugene responded to a report around 12:21...

Portland Solves Downtown Drug Crisis Instantly With Bold New ‘Drug-Free Zone’ Signs

PORTLAND, OR — In a stunning turn of events, downtown Portland’s decades-long struggle with open-air drug use has officially ended—thanks to a bold new policy initiative: putting up a lot of signs. Lining the street like hopeful little soldiers, a series of “DRUG-FREE ZONE” signs now boldly mark...
Eggs in Oregon and Washington Now Required to be Cage-Free

Eggs in Oregon and Washington Now Required to be Cage-Free

As reported by The Oregonian, a significant change in the poultry farming industry has been implemented in Oregon and Washington, with both states enforcing new regulations as of January 1 that require commercial egg farms to adopt cage-free environments for their...

3 People in Portland Dead After Car Shocked By Downed Power Lines

3 People in Portland Dead After Car Shocked By Downed Power Lines

In a tragic incident in Northeast Portland, a devastating accident claimed the lives of three individuals and left a young child injured. This horrific event occurred when power lines, weighed down by a tree branch, tragically fell onto their vehicle. The Portland...

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