Local Deer Photographs Goofy Human Taking 47th Identical Selfie Of The Morning
CANNON BEACH, Ore. — A local black-tailed deer captured a remarkable photograph Saturday morning of an Oregon Coast visitor taking what witnesses confirmed was her 47th nearly identical selfie in front of Haystack Rock. The deer, identified by nearby wildlife as a three-year-old buck named Trevor, had been quietly observing the woman from behind a piece of driftwood for more than an hour before deciding the repetitive human ritual was worth documenting. “At first, I thought she was signaling...
THINGS TO DO & EVENTS
Festivals, concerts, seasonal celebrations, and memorable Oregon adventures worth putting on your calendar.Fresh ideas for getting out and enjoying Oregon, from upcoming community events to unforgettable places and experiences around the state.
Fire Pits, Smores, Bazaar And More At The Coburg Scarecrow Festival
As the leaves fall and the scent of apple cider fills the air, Coburg, Oregon, invites you to experience the magic of fall at the 2023 Coburg Scarecrow Festival.
The West Coast Giant Pumpkin Regatta Returns to Oregon For Fall
In the heart of autumn, when the leaves turn fiery and the air is crisp, Oregon is set to host one of its most beloved and whimsical events – the West Coast Giant Pumpkin Regatta. Now, if you’re...
Get Lost In Oregon’s Ultimate Corn Maze Journey At This Popular Pumpkin Patch
This place is like Halloween meets a wild west showdown, and it’s the hoedown you didn’t know you needed.
ICE Deploys Cougars in Portland, Says Pepper Spray ‘Just Wasn’t Scary Enough’
PORTLAND, OR — After years of experimenting with tear gas, rubber bullets, and pepper spray, Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) has apparently decided to step things up a notch. On Thursday...
National Guard Troops Beg to Be Reassigned After Briefing Includes Photos of Portland’s Nude Cyclists
PORTLAND, OR — Freshly mobilized National Guard troops are already filing desperate reassignment requests after their first Portland briefing included photos from the city’s notorious World Naked...
Move Over Netflix: Portland ICE Protests Officially Crowned America’s Binge-Worthy Reality Series
PORTLAND, OR — Forget “Stranger Things” and “Love Is Blind.” The hottest new reality series gripping America isn’t on Netflix, Hulu, or HBO—it's the nightly Portland ICE protests, streaming live on...
FOOD & DRINK
Explore Oregon’s food and drink scene – from locally sourced ingredients to craft brews and award-winning wines. Plan your culinary adventure now!
This Small Town Oregon Diner Serves Fried Chicken So Good It Tastes Like Grandma Made It
Dig into giant plates of all-day breakfast, fried chicken, and comfort food classics at Screamin’ Chicken Diner in Gaston, where every bite feels like a warm hug from grandma’s kitchen.
The Oregon Steakhouse That Could Rival Anything In Texas
RingSide Steakhouse has served premium steaks, seafood, and legendary onion rings in Portland for over 80 years, offering a classic dining experience with award-winning wine and timeless charm.
The Woman-Owned Saloon In Oregon That Feels Like A Western Movie Come To Life
Blue Duck Saloon in Prineville, Oregon may be off the beaten path, but for those who know where to look, it has become a destination worth every mile. The saloon has built a reputation on elevated...
10 Out of 10 Oregon Hikers Admit Trail Was ‘Just Okay’ Until the Edibles Kicked In
“At first it was just trees. Then it was THE trees.” OREGON CASCADES — A groundbreaking new study from the Pacific Northwest Institute of Vibes has revealed what most Oregon hikers already know in their hearts: hiking is pretty mid until the edibles hit. According to...
BREAKING: Portland Resident Offended by This Headline and Also the Word ‘Resident’
PORTLAND, OR — Chaos erupted in a local community Slack channel today after a Portland man reportedly became deeply offended by the headline of an article that hadn’t even been written yet. Sources confirm that 32-year-old River Moss-Fernwood (they/them), who...
UnitedHealthcare Announces Bold New Plan To Cover Nothing
MINNETONKA, MN — In a daring move sure to disrupt the healthcare industry, UnitedHealthcare unveiled its most ambitious policy overhaul yet: a bold new plan to cover absolutely nothing. “We’ve listened to our customers,” said CEO Clive E. Denial, during a press...
Heavenly Gates Swing Open After Val Kilmer Whispers “I’m Your Huckleberry” to the Intercom
In a moment theologians are already calling “the chillest entrance into the afterlife on record,” actor Val Kilmer ascended to Heaven yesterday and gained immediate entry by softly uttering his iconic Tombstone line — “I’m your huckleberry” — into a slightly outdated...
Middle-Aged Man Confident He ‘Still Got It’ While Mouthing Entire Limp Bizkit Verse at Red Light
SPRINGFIELD, OR — Sources confirmed Wednesday that 43-year-old Tyler Blevins, divorced father of three and assistant manager at the Eugene AutoZone, radiated unshakable confidence while mouthing the entire second verse of Limp Bizkit’s “Re-Arranged” during his morning...
Experts Agree: ‘The NeverEnding Story’ Is The Ultimate Emotional Reset Button
U.S. — After decades of research, burnout, and failed coping strategies involving expensive apps and oat milk lattes, mental health experts have finally reached a consensus: rewatching The NeverEnding Story is the ultimate emotional reset button. “It’s cinematic...
Portland to Roll Out Human Litter Boxes This Summer, Tackling Public Defecation Crisis
In what city officials are calling a “revolution in urban sanitation,” Portland will begin installing CrapTrap 3000™ units across the metro area—human-sized, self-cleaning litter boxes designed to address the growing issue of public defecation, and “shaping the...
Oregon State Scientists Baffled as Willamette River Births New Glow-in-the-Dark Creature
WILLAMETTE VALLEY, OR — In a groundbreaking yet deeply unsettling discovery, scientists at Oregon State University have confirmed the spontaneous emergence of a glow-in-the-dark humanoid creature from the depths of the notoriously murky Willamette River. According to...
Oregon Man’s Depression Downgraded from “Crippling” to “Moody” After Full Day of Sunshine
Creswell, OR — In what mental health experts are calling “a minor miracle” and “the emotional equivalent of unclenching your jaw,” local man Kyle Benson’s depression was officially downgraded from crippling to merely moody following an unprecedented full day of...
Portland Family Says Final Goodbyes to Dad Who Bravely Drank From Benson Bubbler
PORTLAND, OR — A local family is in mourning after 44-year-old Ron Breckman tragically passed away this week following what experts are calling “a reckless and ultimately fatal decision” to drink directly from a downtown Portland Benson Bubbler. “He just leaned in and...