Newport Police Want To Remind Residents You Can’t Booby Trap Your Porch for Thieves
NEWPORT, Ore. — In what can only be described as the most 2026 sentence imaginable, the Newport Oregon Police Department took to Facebook this week to remind residents that no, you cannot rig an exploding package on your front porch… even if someone is actively trespassing to steal it. Yes, really. The post, clearly aimed at the growing popularity of viral “porch pirate justice” videos, explained that while those clips of thieves getting blasted with glitter, dye, or something that smells like...
TRAVEL
Oregon is a beautiful destination for travelers who enjoy exploring the great outdoors. With its diverse landscape of mountains, forests, waterfalls, and coastline, there’s something for everyone to enjoy.
A Woman’s Routine Costco Trip Ended in a Violent Robbery in Salem, Suspect Later Arrested
It happened in the middle of the day. Not late at night. Not in some deserted alley. But in a busy Costco parking lot in Salem, with people around and normal life happening just a few feet away. On...
This New Oregon Restaurant Is Serving Sushi Tacos and We’re Already Obsessed
If Eugene had a food love language, Kasumi House would be fluent in it. This isn’t one of those places that tries to impress you with buzzwords or over-designed plates. Kasumi House is cool in the...
Pedal Through The Valley Or Enjoy Brunch On A Relaxing Santiam Excursion Train Ride
Date Night On A Willamette Valley Train Ride? Yes Please. If you’ve ever driven through the Willamette Valley and caught yourself staring a little too long at the railroad tracks, wondering where...
FOOD & DRINK
Explore Oregon’s food and drink scene – from locally sourced ingredients to craft brews and award-winning wines. Plan your culinary adventure now!
Just Minutes From Portland, This Classic Drive-In Has Been Serving Up Juicy Burgers Since 1968
Craving thick milkshakes, crispy fries, and old-school burgers? This retro drive-in just 13 minutes from Portland has been dishing out classic American eats since the 60s.
The Burgers In This Old-Fashioned Drive-In Have Been An Oregon Staple For Over 60 Years
Serving Baker City since 1960, Burger Bob’s is an old-fashioned drive-in dishing out juicy burgers, crispy fries, and thick milkshakes, all made fresh and worth the wait.
People Say This Oregon Pizzeria Nails Authentic New York–Style Pizza
Serving up authentic NYC-style Sicilian pizza, New York Squares in Independence, Oregon, offers fresh, made-to-order pies with high-quality ingredients and unmatched flavor in every bite.
Portland Decriminalizes Crime—Residents Now Required to Politely Ask Criminals to Stop
Faced with an unprecedented rise in crime, Portland’s City Council has taken decisive action—by officially decriminalizing all crime. In a unanimous vote on Tuesday night, officials opted to remove all criminal penalties from the books, arguing that traditional laws...
Gresham Mysteriously Missing from Yet Another ‘Must-See in Oregon’ Travel Guide
It’s happened again. Another “Top 10 Must-Visit Places in Oregon” article has hit the internet, and, in a shocking turn of events that no one could have possibly predicted, Gresham has once again been left off the list. We’re not talking about some small, overlooked...
Inconvenient Child Declares, “Mom, I Have to Go. Like, Really Bad”—Right After the Final Rest Stop for 50 Miles
RURAL HIGHWAY, USA — In what experts are calling a “statistically impossible yet somehow inevitable event,” a local child has once again declared an urgent need to use the restroom precisely five minutes after the final available rest stop for 50 miles. Eyewitnesses...
After Years of Being in the Ocean, Haystack Rock is Moving to Central Oregon—And People Have Questions
In a move no one saw coming—yet somehow makes complete sense in the most Oregon way possible—state officials have confirmed that Haystack Rock is being relocated to Central Oregon, where it will be placed right next to Smith Rock. Cannon Beach residents, long...
Another Oregon Town Ranked ‘Most Adorable’ by a Magazine You’ve Probably Never Heard Of
Yet another Oregon town has been thrust into the national spotlight, thanks to Quaint Living Weekly, a prestigious, possibly AI-generated publication that, despite its apparent influence, no one has actually seen in print. According to the magazine, [Insert Oregon...
State Officials Confirm: ‘Salem Has a Capitol Building, And That’s Pretty Much It’
SALEM, OR — After years of speculation, confusion, and outright apathy, state officials have finally confirmed what many Oregonians have long suspected: Salem has a Capitol building, and that’s pretty much it. The announcement came during a press conference held in...
Study Finds Oregon Drivers Believe Left Lane is the Perfect Place to Reflect on Life at 52 MPH
SALEM, OR — A new study has confirmed what every frustrated driver on I-5 already suspected: for many Oregonians, the left lane isn’t a place for efficient travel—it’s a sacred space for deep personal reflection at exactly three miles under the speed limit. According...
Outrage in Bend as Forest Green Subaru Shortage Forces Residents to Rethink Entire Personalities
BEND, OR — A crisis of unprecedented proportions has rocked Central Oregon this week, as Bend’s last remaining Subaru dealership officially ran out of forest green Outbacks, sending thousands of residents into a full-blown identity spiral. For years, Bend locals have...
Heroic Man Saves Oregon Woman Who Almost Pumps Diesel into Prius Thinking It’s the ‘Green’ Option
It was a typical cloudy morning at a gas station just off I-5 in Salem, but for one Oregonian, it would become the scene of an epic rescue she’d never forget. Emily Thompson, a lifelong Portland resident and Prius driver, stood frozen in front of the gas pump, her...
President Trump Taps Paul Bunyan to Dig ‘Yuge’ Canal from Oregon to California to Fight Wildfires
In a groundbreaking post on Truth Social, former President Donald Trump announced an unprecedented partnership with legendary lumberjack Paul Bunyan and his trusty blue ox, Babe, to deliver "billions and billions" of gallons of water from the Pacific Northwest to...