News

Welcome to our Oregon News category, where we bring you the latest and most relevant news stories from the beautiful state of Oregon. From the stunning Pacific coastline to the rugged Cascade Mountains, Oregon is home to a wealth of natural beauty, diverse communities, and exciting cultural events.

Welcome to West Coast Game Park Safari, Now With 100% More Firearms, Meth, and Over $1M in Cash

Just over a week after West Coast Game Park Safari in Bandon made headlines for appalling animal neglect and the seizure of over 300 animals, the story has taken an even more shocking turn. New evidence reveals that the park may have been a hub for serious criminal operations, including narcotics...

Northwesterners Eagerly Await That First Deep Breath of Campfire-Flavored Air

EVERYWHERE, PACIFIC NORTHWEST — As summer inches closer and the scent of dry pine needles crisps in the warming breeze, Northwesterners from Bellingham to Bend are reportedly giddy with anticipation for that magical first lungful of campfire-flavored doom. “Oh yeah, you can feel it coming,” said...

Butte Creek Fire Marks Oregon’s First Major Wildfire of 2025 as State Braces for Scorching Summer

WHEELER COUNTY, Ore. — The Butte Creek Fire has become Oregon’s first major wildfire of the 2025 season, erupting Sunday afternoon in northwest Wheeler County and growing rapidly overnight. As of Monday morning, the blaze has scorched an estimated 2,000 acres, a significant jump from the initial...

Extreme Centrist Portlander Avoids Detection After Perfecting Blank Stare During Political Rants

PORTLAND, OR — In a city where expressing even the slightest nuance can result in immediate social exile, local man Brian Callahan has reportedly survived another week in Portland without being outed as a moderate — thanks to a carefully rehearsed “blank, vaguely empathetic stare” he now deploys...

Americans Discover WNBA Still Exists While Pretending They’ve Always Cared About WNBA

In a truly heartwarming display of performative activism, Americans everywhere have suddenly discovered the WNBA is still a thing—and are now passionately pretending they’ve supported it this whole time. The newfound enthusiasm comes not from interest in basketball fundamentals, impressive stat...
Oregon’s Wildfires Are the Top Priority in the Nation

Oregon’s Wildfires Are the Top Priority in the Nation

With 38 significant, uncontrolled wildfires raging across 838,908 acres in Oregon and Washington, the Northwest region has become the highest firefighting priority in the United States. Oregon bears the brunt of this devastation, with 91.5% of the total burning...

Portland Mayor Declares State of Emergency Amid Global IT Outage

Portland Mayor Declares State of Emergency Amid Global IT Outage

Portland Mayor Ted Wheeler declared a state of emergency on Friday morning due to a global IT outage that has significantly impacted airlines, hospitals, and other services. The chaos originated from a flawed software update by CrowdStrike, a cybersecurity company...

Legendary Comedian Bob Newhart Dies at 94

Legendary Comedian Bob Newhart Dies at 94

Bob Newhart, the legendary stand-up comedian known for his distinctive, deadpan delivery, passed away Thursday morning at the age of 94. A Chicago native, Newhart rose to fame with his 1960 breakthrough album, "The Button-Down Mind of Bob Newhart," which won Grammy...

Kah-Nee-Ta Resort Sets Reopening Date After Long-Awaited Renovation

Kah-Nee-Ta Resort Sets Reopening Date After Long-Awaited Renovation

After years of renovations, delays, and anticipation, Kah-Nee-Ta Hot Springs Resort has finally announced its reopening date. The Warm Springs resort revealed on Monday that it will welcome guests again starting Thursday, July 18. Visitors can look forward to enjoying...

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