News

Welcome to our Oregon News category, where we bring you the latest and most relevant news stories from the beautiful state of Oregon. From the stunning Pacific coastline to the rugged Cascade Mountains, Oregon is home to a wealth of natural beauty, diverse communities, and exciting cultural events.

Wife Deploys Tactical Rib Jab in Final Attempt to End Husband’s Snoring

MONROE, OR — In the early hours of Wednesday morning, local woman Emily Patterson reportedly launched what experts are calling a "precision-targeted rib jab" into the soft flank of her peacefully unconscious husband, Greg, in a final, desperate effort to end what has been described by neighbors as...

Oregon Capitol Swaps Gold Man for Dad Bod Guy Holding a Vape to Better Represent the Future

SALEM, OR — In a historic and absolutely necessary move, Oregon officials have replaced the iconic Gold Man statue atop the State Capitol with a shirtless, vape-clutching dad bod guy, a bold tribute to the future of civilization. The new statue, affectionately dubbed “Rip the Pioneer”, stands in...

Fyre Festival 2 Promises to Strand Attendees Before They Even Arrive

Fyre Festival 2 is officially happening, and organizers are promising the most authentic festival experience yet—so authentic, in fact, that attendees should expect to be stranded before they even arrive. But this time, founder and convicted fraudster Billy McFarland wants everyone to know that...

‘I’m Good for One More’: 37-Year-Old Dad of Two Boldly Orders Another Round at 10:15 PM

“I’m good for one more,” said 37-year-old dad of two, Brad Simmons, at precisely 10:15 PM, stunning his coworkers into silence. Witnesses at O’Malley’s Pub reported that the statement was made with the kind of reckless optimism typically reserved for people in their mid-20s or those who still...

Oregon Braces for a Full Week of Raining Cats and Dogs – Local Shelters at Capacity

Oregon residents are in for a ruff week as meteorologists confirm that, yes, it will indeed be raining cats and dogs for the next seven days straight. With fluffy precipitation already falling in some areas, local shelters are struggling to keep up, and pet stores are reporting record sales of...
First Confirmed ‘Murder Hornet’ Trapped In Washington

First Confirmed ‘Murder Hornet’ Trapped In Washington

There's never a dull moment in the northwest these days, is there? If things weren't exciting enough for you as we head into the weekend, and the first day of August, we thought we'd heat things up a bit with this latest report from KOIN 6. The Washington State...

Take a New Zip Line Tour To Marvel Over Mt. Bachelor, Oregon

Take a New Zip Line Tour To Marvel Over Mt. Bachelor, Oregon

In need of a great vacation idea or family getaway? You need to try Mt. Bachelor's new and awe-inspiring Ziptour down the mountain...RIGHT NOW. This zip line features dual-spans seven feet apart, perfect for zipping with a friend or loved one. This is a three-stage...

Oregon Getting Closer To Legalizing Psychedelic Mushrooms

Oregon Getting Closer To Legalizing Psychedelic Mushrooms

Psilocybin (Magic Mushrooms) may soon be legal to use in Oregon in therapeutic treatment settings. Recently enough signatures were gathered to put a measure on Oregon's November ballot. If the measure passes, it means a new program will be phased in over two years to...

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