Adventures

Portland Man Emerges from Wet Cave After 93 Days, Hisses at Sunlight

OREGON COAST — In a scene described by witnesses as “like Gollum but with better accessories,” a Portland man known only as “Dreadmor, Lord of the Drizzle” emerged from a mossy coastal cave on Monday, flinching at the brightness of the midday sun and audibly hissing at a passing jogger. Witnesses...

Report: Oregon Inches Closer To California In Prestigious ‘Most Expensive State To Be Broke’ List

SALEM, OR — In a glowing new report released this week, Oregon has proudly climbed to the #2 position in the nation’s highly competitive Most Expensive State To Be Broke rankings, closing the gap with longtime champion California. “Oregon is showing real promise,” said lead economist Dana...

Finally, a Summer Theme Park Where No Kids Poop in the Lazy River and a 100% Chance of Blacking Out By Noon

ORLANDO, FL — A groundbreaking new theme park is making headlines for its two revolutionary promises: no children in the lazy river — and every adult will be aggressively blacked out by lunchtime. Lazy River Lagoon, opening this summer, has been described as “Spring Break meets early retirement” —...

That Methy Neighbor Wearing Headlamp at 2:30AM Is Just One Bolt Away From Wrapping It Up

SPRINGFIELD, OR — Residents of a quiet suburban street were once again reassured by the familiar clanking of socket wrenches and muttered profanity echoing through the neighborhood as that really cool methy neighbor resumed work on his eternally disassembled Honda Civic at exactly 2:30AM. Armed...

Ride This Coastal Train In Oregon For A Spring Break Adventure You’ll Never Forget

If you're looking for the perfect spring break activity on the Oregon Coast, this is it. Sun, sea air, coastal charm—and the nostalgic click-clack of a historic train. The Spring Break Excursion aboard the Oregon Coast Scenic Railroad is back for 2025, and it's a delightful way for families,...
The Most Bizarre Museum in Oregon Will Leave You Scratching Your Head in Wonder

The Most Bizarre Museum in Oregon Will Leave You Scratching Your Head in Wonder

If you're on the hunt for something delightfully weird in Portland, The Zymoglyphic Museum is an absolute must-see. Tucked away in the quiet Mount Tabor neighborhood, this hidden gem celebrates the bizarre, the beautiful, and the downright fascinating. With free...

Christmas Eve & Christmas Day Hours: What’s Open in Oregon?

Christmas Eve & Christmas Day Hours: What’s Open in Oregon?

Are grocery stores open in Oregon on Christmas?Most grocery stores across Oregon will have reduced hours on Christmas Eve and be closed on Christmas Day. Here’s a breakdown of major chains: Albertsons and Safeway: Open on Christmas Eve with reduced hours. While most...

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