News

Welcome to our Oregon News category, where we bring you the latest and most relevant news stories from the beautiful state of Oregon. From the stunning Pacific coastline to the rugged Cascade Mountains, Oregon is home to a wealth of natural beauty, diverse communities, and exciting cultural events.

Report: Another Guy Gets “Unique” Forest Tattoo on Forearm

PORTLAND, OR — In a development surprising no one, another guy in the Pacific Northwest has reportedly gotten a tattoo of a forest on his forearm. Witnesses say the man, identified only as “Kyle,” emerged from a local tattoo studio Tuesday afternoon sporting a tasteful arrangement of silhouetted...

Jerry Garcia Back From the Dead, Oregon Country Fairgoers Blame the Edibles After Surprise Ghost Set

VENETA, Ore. — In a move that can only be described as “Grateful, Undead and Totally Unexpected,” the spirit of Jerry Garcia reportedly materialized onstage Friday evening at the Oregon Country Fair, triggering mass confusion that was blamed entirely on rampant edible consumption. Festivalgoers...

Tina Kotek Announces $500 Fine for “Unauthorized Splashing” on Oregon Rivers

SALEM, OR — In a bold new effort to “restore order and tranquility” to Oregon’s waterways, Governor Tina Kotek unveiled legislation this week that would impose a $500 fine for any “unauthorized splashing” on rivers across the state. “Too many Oregonians think they can just hop on an inner tube and...

Experts Confirm Only Chance of National Unity Is If Asteroid Obliterates Planet

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a sobering report released Thursday, leading political scientists confirmed that the only remaining path toward national unity would require a planet-destroying asteroid to obliterate all life on Earth. “After analyzing decades of data, partisan divides, and over 47 million...

Senator Jeff Merkley Pledges 13th Term in 2064 at Age 108, Promises to Outlive Every Republican

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Vowing to “finish what he started back when Herbert Hoover was in short pants,” Oregon Senator Jeff Merkley announced Thursday that he will seek a 13th term in 2064 at the age of 108, confidently declaring his intention to outlive every remaining member of the Republican Party....
Sylvia Beach Hotel in Newport to Undergo Renovations in 2025

Sylvia Beach Hotel in Newport to Undergo Renovations in 2025

Nestled on a picturesque bluff overlooking the Pacific Ocean, the Sylvia Beach Hotel in Newport, Oregon, has long been a cherished retreat for book lovers and travelers alike. Renowned for its literary charm, the hotel is now embarking on a new chapter. On Sunday,...

Homeowner Fatally Shoots Intruder Breaking In Day After Christmas

Homeowner Fatally Shoots Intruder Breaking In Day After Christmas

On the evening of December 26, 2024, in Manatee County, Florida, a homeowner demonstrated the importance of being prepared to defend one’s home and loved ones. Two intruders forced their way into the home, but one of them would not leave alive. The incident...

Could Macy’s Be Saying Goodbye to Salem Center Mall in 2025?

Could Macy’s Be Saying Goodbye to Salem Center Mall in 2025?

The retail landscape is shifting rapidly, and once-iconic department stores are finding it increasingly difficult to stay relevant in the digital age. Macy’s, a brand that has long symbolized the quintessential American shopping experience, is facing mounting...

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