News

Welcome to our Oregon News category, where we bring you the latest and most relevant news stories from the beautiful state of Oregon. From the stunning Pacific coastline to the rugged Cascade Mountains, Oregon is home to a wealth of natural beauty, diverse communities, and exciting cultural events.

Man Stares Blankly as Wife Introduces 86th Plant This Year

SWEET HOME, OR — Sources confirmed Wednesday that local husband Dave Ellsworth stood motionless and dead-eyed as his wife, Amanda, held up yet another leafy green stranger and announced, “Everyone say hi to Juniper!” It was the 86th time this year. Dave, who hasn’t made direct eye contact with his...

People You Regret Voting For Hold Emergency Session to Dream Up Taxes That Don’t Exist Yet but Probably Should

In a move that perfectly embodies everything you feared after the election but told yourself to “wait and see,” the people you now deeply regret voting for held an emergency meeting today—not to fix potholes, homelessness, or anything remotely useful—but to invent entirely new taxes. The...

Bigfoot Joins Tinder, Women Ditch Their Men After Reading: ‘I Chop Wood and Disappear Like Your Dad’

HOOD RIVER, OR — In what experts are calling the most emotionally devastating swipe in Oregon history, Bigfoot has officially joined Tinder with a bio so powerful it has women across the Pacific Northwest dumping their boyfriends mid-swipe. The bio in question?“I chop wood and disappear like your...

New Club “Granny Grinders” Opens in Oregon With 65+ Dancers, Bingo, and Zero Teeth Required

Springfield, OR — Residents were once again left clutching their pearls this week after hearing rumors about yet another offbeat strip club opening in their neighborhood — but this time, it’s not pregnant women causing a stir. It’s grandmothers. The new establishment, opening just outside of...

Goodwill Boutique Staff Confused Why Poor People Keep Trying to Shop There

NEWPORT, OR — Staff at the Goodwill Boutique on Cape & Donation Center are reportedly “deeply puzzled” by the steady stream of financially struggling people who keep showing up under the false assumption that this is a place for affordable clothing — rather than a coastal showroom for $58...
Multnomah Falls Named Top Instagrammable Waterfall In US

Multnomah Falls Named Top Instagrammable Waterfall In US

We all know how pretty The Beaver State is. Oregon is chock-full of hiking trails, gorgeous coastal vistas, snowcapped mountains, tranquil mountain lakes, hot springs, waterfalls, high desert sunsets, and breathtaking views. It's no surprise then that Oregon has been...

Butte Creek Falls To Re-Open After Four Year Closure

Butte Creek Falls To Re-Open After Four Year Closure

We've got some good news just in time for the summer hiking season: Butte Creek Falls is about to re-open after being closed since 2020 due to wildfires! We love hiking, waterfalls, and forest bathing in general, so we're beyond excited to bring this news to you....

Bull Jumps Fence at Sisters Rodeo, Injuring Spectators

Bull Jumps Fence at Sisters Rodeo, Injuring Spectators

An unexpected event at the Sisters Rodeo on Saturday night resulted in injuries to three individuals. During the final bull riding segment, a bull unexpectedly leapt over a fence, escaping the arena and entering a spectator zone. According to officials, the bull...

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