That Oregon Life · Stories & discoveries
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SALEM, OR — In a groundbreaking effort to reduce gun violence and increase reloading time to a full 90 seconds, Oregon lawmakers have passed a new bill that limits all private citizens to only single-shot muskets.…
SILVER FALLS STATE PARK, OR — What began as a peaceful afternoon hike took an unexpectedly magical turn this week when a group of Oregon hikers reported being stopped by a robed wizard demanding “their finest…
In a growing trend that many are calling “unhinged but deeply on-brand,” hikers throughout the Pacific Northwest have started voluntarily smashing their own car windows at trailheads in pursuit of what they describe as a more…
OREGON COAST — In a scene described by witnesses as “like Gollum but with better accessories,” a Portland man known only as “Dreadmor, Lord of the Drizzle” emerged from a mossy coastal cave on Monday, flinching…
It’s just common sense,” says homeowner who paid $6.2 million to avoid eye contact. LAKE OSWEGO, OR — Wealthy residents of Lake Oswego, Oregon erupted in reserved, polite applause this week as a bold new sign…
SALEM, OR — In a glowing new report released this week, Oregon has proudly climbed to the #2 position in the nation’s highly competitive Most Expensive State To Be Broke rankings, closing the gap with longtime…
ORLANDO, FL — A groundbreaking new theme park is making headlines for its two revolutionary promises: no children in the lazy river — and every adult will be aggressively blacked out by lunchtime. Lazy River Lagoon,…
SALEM, OR — In response to the growing public disdain for Elon Musk and the unfortunate social consequences of driving something associated with him, the Oregon DMV has announced a new mandatory six-week course for all…
In a baffling but somehow deeply Oregonian development, state officials have confirmed that the recently vacated site of Haystack Rock at Cannon Beach has now been filled with the Oregon Pioneer—better known as the Gold Man…
PORTLAND, OR — Local accountant Greg Waller, 42, expressed mild admiration through clenched teeth Thursday evening as he sat motionless in traffic for the third consecutive hour due to a massive anti-Trump protest downtown. “This protest…
EUGENE, OR — City officials are urging residents to stop feeding psychedelic mushrooms to local squirrels, after what one parks employee described as a “full-blown squirrel consciousness shift” unfolded near the duck pond at Alton Baker…
SWEET HOME, OR — After weeks of intense financial planning and one extremely awkward meeting with a steak loan officer, local dad Ron Beckett has officially secured a down payment on two USDA Choice ribeye steaks—just…
