News

Welcome to our Oregon News category, where we bring you the latest and most relevant news stories from the beautiful state of Oregon. From the stunning Pacific coastline to the rugged Cascade Mountains, Oregon is home to a wealth of natural beauty, diverse communities, and exciting cultural events.

Missing Eugene Cat Allegedly Just Blazed Out of His Mind at the Neighbors’ Place

EUGENE, OR — A frantic search for a local feline came to a mellow conclusion Thursday afternoon after “Mittens,” a 3-year-old tabby, was located at a nearby house party, absolutely blitzed and sprawled across a bean bag chair in a dense fog of incense and weed smoke. “We thought he was lost or...

Officials Seek Public’s Help After Elephant Seal Pup Brutally Stabbed on Oregon Coast

In a disturbing and heartbreaking incident, a young elephant seal pup was found stabbed multiple times on the beach in Neskowin, Oregon—and officials are asking for the public’s help to track down the person responsible. According to NOAA’s Office of Law Enforcement, the attack happened late...

Trump to Reopen Toys “R” Us as Maximum Security Prison for “Really Bad Kids”

BEDMINSTER, NJ — In a bold move to “bring back law, order, and Geoffrey the Giraffe,” former President Donald Trump announced Thursday that he will personally oversee the reopening of defunct toy store chain Toys “R” Us — this time as a maximum security prison exclusively for unruly children....

This Oregon Coast Beach Was Ranked the Best Spot to Watch a Seagull Steal a Burrito From a Toddler

CANNON BEACH, OR — In a move that shocked no one familiar with Oregon’s coastal crime wave of airborne kleptomaniacs, Cannon Beach has officially been ranked the most scenic location to witness a seagull violently rob a child of a full-size burrito in broad daylight. The incident that inspired the...

Bend Man Completes Full Conversation Without Mentioning He Mountain Bikes

BEND, OR — In what experts are calling a “statistical anomaly” and “spiritual awakening,” local resident Tyler Hensley reportedly completed an entire five-minute conversation on Friday without once mentioning that he mountain bikes. The exchange took place at a local coffee shop known for...
Oregon’s Wildfires Are the Top Priority in the Nation

Oregon’s Wildfires Are the Top Priority in the Nation

With 38 significant, uncontrolled wildfires raging across 838,908 acres in Oregon and Washington, the Northwest region has become the highest firefighting priority in the United States. Oregon bears the brunt of this devastation, with 91.5% of the total burning...

Portland Mayor Declares State of Emergency Amid Global IT Outage

Portland Mayor Declares State of Emergency Amid Global IT Outage

Portland Mayor Ted Wheeler declared a state of emergency on Friday morning due to a global IT outage that has significantly impacted airlines, hospitals, and other services. The chaos originated from a flawed software update by CrowdStrike, a cybersecurity company...

Legendary Comedian Bob Newhart Dies at 94

Legendary Comedian Bob Newhart Dies at 94

Bob Newhart, the legendary stand-up comedian known for his distinctive, deadpan delivery, passed away Thursday morning at the age of 94. A Chicago native, Newhart rose to fame with his 1960 breakthrough album, "The Button-Down Mind of Bob Newhart," which won Grammy...

Kah-Nee-Ta Resort Sets Reopening Date After Long-Awaited Renovation

Kah-Nee-Ta Resort Sets Reopening Date After Long-Awaited Renovation

After years of renovations, delays, and anticipation, Kah-Nee-Ta Hot Springs Resort has finally announced its reopening date. The Warm Springs resort revealed on Monday that it will welcome guests again starting Thursday, July 18. Visitors can look forward to enjoying...

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