Pacific Power: “We Understand You’re Struggling—That’s Why We’re Raising Rates Again”
SALEM, OR — In a heartfelt press release delivered with the emotional depth of a dropped toaster, Pacific Power announced its latest rate increase this week, citing "deep empathy" for the financial hardship many Oregonians are facing. “We know times are tough,” said company spokesperson Riley Kilowatt, adjusting his Patagonia fleece in an air-conditioned boardroom. “That’s why we’re proud to announce a significant rate hike—because when our customers suffer, we want to make sure we’re right...
TRAVEL
Oregon is a beautiful destination for travelers who enjoy exploring the great outdoors. With its diverse landscape of mountains, forests, waterfalls, and coastline, there’s something for everyone to enjoy.
Ever Wanted To See Inside A Multi-Million Dollar Oregon Home? Now’s Your Chance
Just outside of Smith Rock State Park sits a stunning home with even more stunning views, and it can be yours for just under five million dollars.
Millions of Blooms Await! Don’t Miss the 2025 Wooden Shoe Tulip Festival in Oregon
Rows and rows of colorful tulips on a foggy morning or a crisp spring day are the perfect way to welcome spring. The Wooden Shoe Tulip Festival offers blooms, hot air balloons, wine, and family fun!
Bigger, Bolder, Better: Pioneer Joe Coffee Becomes the Largest Roaster on the Oregon Coast
The Oregon Coast has long been synonymous with stunning ocean views, quaint coastal towns, and a vibrant sense of community. Now, coffee enthusiasts in Lincoln City have another reason to celebrate:...
FOOD & DRINK
Explore Oregon’s food and drink scene – from locally sourced ingredients to craft brews and award-winning wines. Plan your culinary adventure now!
People Drive From All Over Oregon To Indulge In The Ultimate Comfort Food At This Cozy Brewery
Tucked away in the small town of Monroe, Oregon, Long Timber Brewing Company is more than just a microbrewery and restaurant—it’s a tribute to the region’s rich logging history and a culinary...
The Shari’s We Once Knew Is Gone, and Its Empty Buildings Are Up for Grabs
PORTLAND, Ore. – If you ever spent a late night at Shari’s, chain-smoking cigarettes and nursing bottomless coffee refills in the ‘90s, this one stings. Shari’s Café & Pies—once a beacon of...
Bigger, Bolder, Better: Pioneer Joe Coffee Becomes the Largest Roaster on the Oregon Coast
The Oregon Coast has long been synonymous with stunning ocean views, quaint coastal towns, and a vibrant sense of community. Now, coffee enthusiasts in Lincoln City have another reason to celebrate:...
Uh Oh: Eugene Man Shocked to Learn Constitution Still Has That Gun Thing In It
EUGENE, OR — Local part-time kombucha brewer Jasper Willow-Breeze experienced what experts are calling "acute textual trauma" this week after skimming a pocket Constitution and discovering the Second Amendment is still in there. “I thought we deleted that back in...
This Isn’t Satire: Eugene Man Arrested After Threats With Gun-Shaped Bong in Grocery Store Parking Lot
You’d be forgiven for thinking this was another one of our ridiculous headlines—because “man with rifle-shaped bong triggers full police response” sounds straight out of satire. But nope. This one’s 100% real, Oregon. On Friday afternoon, May 2, police in Eugene...
Portland Solves Downtown Drug Crisis Instantly With Bold New ‘Drug-Free Zone’ Signs
PORTLAND, OR — In a stunning turn of events, downtown Portland’s decades-long struggle with open-air drug use has officially ended—thanks to a bold new policy initiative: putting up a lot of signs. Lining the street like hopeful little soldiers, a series of “DRUG-FREE...
Trump Proposes New Holidays: ‘We’re the Best Day’ and ‘Other Countries Are Losers Day’
PALM BEACH, FL — In a late-night post on Truth Social sandwiched between rants about wind turbines and the deep state, former President Donald Trump announced a bold new plan to reshape the American holiday calendar by adding two new national holidays: “We’re the Best...
Portland Protesters Demand More Things to Protest
PORTLAND, OR — In a surprising show of unity, hundreds of Portland protesters gathered downtown Tuesday not to decry a specific issue, but to demand more things to be upset about. “Frankly, we’re running out,” said protester Kai Evergreen, who held a blank cardboard...
New Oregon Zip Line Debuts With Thrilling New Twist: Direct Collision With Tree
BEND, OR — In what Deschutes County officials are calling “an immersive forest engagement experience,” a new zip line attraction has opened just outside Bend — and instead of a smooth landing, it launches riders face-first into a very large pine tree. The ride, funded...
Woman Asks If Jeans Make Her Look Fat, Already Decided They Do
TUALATIN, OR — In a shocking display of emotional choreography and predetermined self-loathing, 34-year-old Heather Cline asked her boyfriend for the 497th time if her jeans made her look fat, despite having already rendered a silent, irrevocable verdict of “yes” the...
Pale Little Oregon Man Spotted in Tank Top; Witnesses in Troutdale Call It “Too Soon”
TROUTDALE, OR — In a shocking display of seasonal overconfidence, local man Darren Melby was reportedly seen walking down Main Street in a salmon-pink tank top Thursday morning, sending townsfolk into a mild panic and causing three drivers to swerve. “He was just out...
Doctors Confirm You’re Technically Still Alive, Just Tired Forever After Age 36
ATLANTA, GA — In a groundbreaking new report released Friday, doctors from the National Institute of Realistic Health confirmed that individuals over the age of 36 are, in fact, technically still alive—though most are now operating in a permanent state of exhaustion,...
Local Meth Cook Gives Back by Providing Free ‘Science Lessons’ to Youth
EUGENE, OR — In an inspiring display of community spirit, local meth entrepreneur Travis "Sparky" Jenkins has announced a new initiative aimed at educating the next generation of scientists: free backyard "science lessons" for area youth. “I just want to give back,...