SALEM, OR — A new study has confirmed what every frustrated driver on I-5 already suspected: for many Oregonians, the left lane isn’t a place for efficient travel—it’s a sacred space for deep personal reflection at exactly three miles under the speed limit. According...
News
Welcome to our Oregon News category, where we bring you the latest and most relevant news stories from the beautiful state of Oregon. From the stunning Pacific coastline to the rugged Cascade Mountains, Oregon is home to a wealth of natural beauty, diverse communities, and exciting cultural events.
Outrage in Bend as Forest Green Subaru Shortage Forces Residents to Rethink Entire Personalities
BEND, OR — A crisis of unprecedented proportions has rocked Central Oregon this week, as Bend’s last remaining Subaru dealership officially ran out of forest green Outbacks, sending thousands of residents into a full-blown identity spiral. For years, Bend locals have...
Heroic Man Saves Oregon Woman Who Almost Pumps Diesel into Prius Thinking It’s the ‘Green’ Option
It was a typical cloudy morning at a gas station just off I-5 in Salem, but for one Oregonian, it would become the scene of an epic rescue she’d never forget. Emily Thompson, a lifelong Portland resident and Prius driver, stood frozen in front of the gas pump, her...
President Trump Taps Paul Bunyan to Dig ‘Yuge’ Canal from Oregon to California to Fight Wildfires
In a groundbreaking post on Truth Social, former President Donald Trump announced an unprecedented partnership with legendary lumberjack Paul Bunyan and his trusty blue ox, Babe, to deliver "billions and billions" of gallons of water from the Pacific Northwest to...
Trump Promises to Restore Natural Hair Greatness by Banning Blue Hair
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a groundbreaking announcement today, Donald Trump declared that blue hair will soon be banned across the United States in an effort to "restore national pride and patriotism." The bold initiative, dubbed the "Hair to the Chief Act," would outlaw...
Oregon Man Tells Gas Attendant ‘I’ve Got This,’ Secretly Hopes He’ll Still Help
PORTLAND, OR — It’s been nearly two years since Oregon officially joined the rest of the country in allowing self-serve gas, but for Gary Thurman, a 36-year-old lifelong Oregonian, the adjustment has been anything but smooth. On Tuesday, Gary pulled into a local Shell...
Three Days of Sunshine Spark Mostly Peaceful Protests as Portlanders Demand the Return of Gray Skies
PORTLAND, OR — In a city famous for its love of drizzle, gloom, and perfectly damp mornings, three consecutive days of sunshine have sent locals into a full-blown existential crisis. Hundreds of Portlanders gathered downtown on Sunday to demand the immediate return of...
Portland Renters and Their Cats Must Mask Up 24/7 or Face Eviction
In a move that has sparked both confusion and concern, the City of Portland has implemented a groundbreaking new policy requiring renters to wear masks at all times, even in the privacy of their own apartments, when alone. This decision comes in response to growing...
Oregon Ranks in the Middle for Drivers, But California and Washington Hit Bottom
Anyone in Oregon knows that driving in Portland can be an absolute nightmare. With limited lanes, outdated infrastructure, and an influx of new residents over the years, it’s clear the city wasn’t built to handle today’s population. From the constant bottlenecks on...
Trump Declassifies Decades-Old Files on JFK, RFK, and MLK Assassinations
In a stunning move that has sent waves through historians, conspiracy theorists, and truth-seekers alike, President Donald Trump signed an executive order to declassify all remaining files related to the assassinations of President John F. Kennedy, Senator Robert F....
Bend Sheriff and Mayor Push Back on Trump’s Federal Immigration Enforcement
As reported by Central Oregon Daily, law enforcement agencies in Central Oregon have clarified their approach to immigration enforcement amidst increased federal efforts under the Trump administration. At the same time, Oregon has joined a coalition of states...
Nine Inch Nails Announces ‘Peel It Back’ World Tour with a Stop in Portland, Oregon
Get ready, Oregon! The legendary Nine Inch Nails is hitting the road again for their newly announced Peel It Back Tour, and they’re making a highly anticipated stop in Portland. The Grammy-winning alternative rock powerhouse, fronted by the iconic Trent Reznor and...