by Tyler James | Mar 2, 2025 | Humor, News, Satire
PORTLAND, OR — Health experts have today issued a shocking warning that fentanyl circulating on the streets of Portland has tested positive for gluten, a protein composite normally found in wheat, rye, and barley. In response, a new advocacy group called Action on...
by Tyler James | Mar 1, 2025 | Adventures, Humor, News, Satire
PORTLAND, OR – Walmart has unveiled a bold new experiment in Portland, testing out cutting-edge AI-powered technology designed to combat a growing problem: tweakers. The store’s automatic doors are now equipped with advanced artificial intelligence that can detect...
by Tyler James | Mar 1, 2025 | Adventures, Humor, News, Satire
SPRINGFIELD, OR — The scent of lighter fluid and overconfidence filled the air Friday afternoon as local dad, Greg Thompson, triumphantly wheeled out his Weber grill, declaring it "grilling season" the moment temperatures climbed to a balmy 50 degrees. Despite a...
by Tyler James | Mar 1, 2025 | Humor, News, Satire
In a stunning turn of events, the Mexican government has officially declared Spanish as the country’s national language, following the bold example set by former U.S. President Donald Trump, who recently declared English the official language of the United States. The...
by Tyler James | Feb 28, 2025 | Humor, News, Satire
PORTLAND, OR — The search for 34-year-old Kevin Michaels, who was last seen attempting to merge onto I-205 during rush hour, continues as family and friends hold out hope for his safe return. Kevin left his Southeast Portland home last Tuesday morning, reportedly en...
by Tyler James | Feb 27, 2025 | Humor, News, Satire
Portland’s tourism board has announced an exciting new way for visitors to experience the city’s vibrant urban landscape: “TentBnB” – the ultimate authentic downtown lodging experience! For just $89 a night (or $10 if you book directly with Rick behind the 7-Eleven),...
by Tyler James | Feb 27, 2025 | Humor, News, Satire
BREAKING: The long-awaited Epstein list is finally set to be released today, and officials insist—without a single wink or nervous glance—that it is completely unaltered, totally uncompromised, and in no way missing any names that might cause billionaires to break out...
by Tyler James | Feb 27, 2025 | Humor, News, Satire
Hundreds of Oregonians were rushed to the hospital over the past couple of days after an unseasonably bright sun made the mistake of shining down upon the pasty, vitamin-D-deprived masses emerging from their winter hibernation. The incident, now being referred to as...
by Tyler James | Feb 27, 2025 | News
VIDA, Ore. — As reported by KEZI, a man and his two dogs are lucky to be alive after a harrowing incident on Highway 126 in Vida. A powerful windstorm sent trees crashing down, impaling his vehicle and leaving first responders stunned that anyone inside had survived....
by Jessica Tomlinson | Feb 27, 2025 | Adventures, Entertainment, Events, Family Fun, Farm Visits, Featured, Festivals, Home & Garden, Interesting, Things To Do, Travel, Willamette Valley
Rows and rows of colorful tulips on a foggy morning or a crisp spring day are the perfect way to welcome spring. The Wooden Shoe Tulip Festival offers blooms, hot air balloons, wine, and family fun! Spring in Oregon means one thing—tulip season! The Wooden Shoe Tulip...
