Dozens of families are reeling in the Columbia River Gorge this week after the Rowena Fire tore through Wasco County, destroying at least 49 homes and leaving hundreds more in its path. The fire, which broke out Wednesday between Mosier and The Dalles, has scorched...
News
Welcome to our Oregon News category, where we bring you the latest and most relevant news stories from the beautiful state of Oregon. From the stunning Pacific coastline to the rugged Cascade Mountains, Oregon is home to a wealth of natural beauty, diverse communities, and exciting cultural events.
Thousands Expected at ‘No Kings’ Protests Across Oregon This Weekend as Trump Turns 79
Oregon is gearing up for another round of widespread protests this Saturday, June 14 — and this time, the message is simple: No Kings. The rallying cry is part of a massive nationwide day of action targeting former President Donald Trump, organized by groups like...
Existential Dread Peaks as Woman Realizes It’s Time to Go to Walmart Again
SPRINGFIELD, OR — Local woman Kelly Harmon was reportedly enjoying a quiet Saturday morning, sipping coffee and pretending she didn’t have responsibilities, when a chill ran down her spine. “It hit me all at once,” she said, staring into the void. “We’re out of...
Couple Plans Romantic Friday Night Watching the World Burn with a Bottle of Pinot and a Cheese Platter
PORTLAND, OR — While many couples might opt for a candlelit dinner or a rom-com, local partners Jesse and Rowan have found a more thrilling way to spend quality time together: watching chaos unfold in real-time from the comfort of their couch. “We wanted something a...
Man Fondly Recalls Childhood Road Trips When Mom Turned the Nissan Into a Marlboro Sauna
SALEM, OR — Nostalgia hit hard this week for 42-year-old Brent Halverson, who fondly remembered a simpler time when seatbelts were optional, ashtrays were full, and his mother hotboxed a two-door Nissan Sentra like she was training for a Marlboro Light 100s endurance...
Protesters Try to Burn Down Portland ICE Facility as Police Reaffirm They Won’t Assist Feds
Another Portland protest turned dangerous Wednesday night after demonstrators attempted to set fire to the federal ICE building in South Portland. According to Portland Police, the incident escalated just before 10 p.m. when officers observed a man stacking flammable...
Portland on Edge as Smooth-Skinned Weirdo Without Tattoos Walks Into Powell’s
PORTLAND, OR — Tension rippled through Powell’s City of Books on Tuesday after a smooth-skinned weirdo with no visible tattoos and—more disturbingly—no bumper stickers on his car was seen casually walking into the store. Witnesses say the man, described by one...
Wildfire Erupts Near Rowena Crest, Level 3 Evacuations Ordered
ROWENA, Ore. — A fast-moving wildfire erupted Wednesday afternoon near the iconic Rowena Crest viewpoint in the Columbia River Gorge, forcing urgent Level 3 “Go Now” evacuations in the area. The Wasco County Sheriff’s Office reported the fire shortly after 1:30 p.m.,...
Officials Urge Rioters to Stretch Before Peacefully Yeeting Bricks for Injury Prevention
PORTLAND, OR — In anticipation of this weekend’s peaceful protest that definitely won’t involve any windows mysteriously shattering themselves, city health officials have released a helpful reminder to all would-be demonstrators: “Don’t forget to stretch before...
Local Woman Sips Warm White Claw, Finds Peace After Watching Flip-Flop Drift Off Into the Current
OREGON — It was supposed to be just another day of lazy tubing, questionable sunscreen application, and aggressively warm seltzers. But for one local woman, the universe had something deeper in store — a reckoning of the soul, delivered via footwear. Kayla Dunham, 31,...
Dutch Bros Moves Out of Oregon, Says It’s Part of Growth Strategy
GRANTS PASS, Ore. — One of Oregon’s most iconic brands is making a big move—but says it’s not turning its back on the Beaver State. Dutch Bros, the wildly popular coffee chain that got its start as a humble pushcart in Grants Pass in 1992, announced this week that...
Migrants Flee After Federal Agents Project AI Trump Riding Eagle at Border
NOGALES, AZ — Migrants attempting to cross the U.S.-Mexico border fled in confusion and terror this week after federal agents deployed a towering AI-generated hologram of former President Donald Trump riding a bald eagle, sources confirmed. Witnesses say the...