by Tyler James | Mar 15, 2025 | Humor, News, Satire
Residents of Pine Hollow, Oregon, barely had time to recover from the ribbon-cutting of their 7th Dollar General before town officials announced the construction of store #8—directly across the street. The decision, described by Mayor Tom Wilkins as “inevitable,” was...
by Tyler James | Mar 14, 2025 | Adventures, Humor, News, Satire
In a bold and completely normal security upgrade, Tesla has officially deployed fire-breathing robot dogs to patrol its dealerships nationwide. The flamethrower-equipped quadrupeds, affectionately dubbed "CyberHounds," have already proven to be highly effective at...
by Tyler James | Mar 14, 2025 | Humor, News, Satire
PORTLAND, OR — Local couple Brian and Jessica Holloway were overjoyed to snag floor tickets to see their favorite band live, dropping a casual $1,200 for what they expected to be a magical night of music, love, and unforgettable memories. Instead, they spent the...
by Tyler James | Mar 14, 2025 | History, Opinion
Gun control in the United States has never truly been about public safety—it has been about control. Throughout history, firearm restrictions have been disproportionately used to disarm Black Americans, marginalized communities, and anyone deemed a "threat" to the...
by Tyler James | Mar 13, 2025 | Humor, News, Satire
Oregon meteorologists have officially given up. After a week that included sunshine, rain, and snow—sometimes all in the same afternoon—local weather forecasters admitted they are now just blindly throwing darts at a weather map and hoping for the best. “Look, we...
by Tyler James | Mar 13, 2025 | News
The coastal community of Newport is coming together in support of the family of Dane Paulsen, the 2-year-old boy who tragically went missing earlier this month and was recently found in the Siletz River. As the Paulsen family navigates this heartbreaking loss, friends...
by Tyler James | Mar 13, 2025 | News
PORTLAND, Ore. — In yet another attack on the Second Amendment, Oregon’s State Court of Appeals has ruled Measure 114 constitutional, setting the stage for one of the most restrictive gun control laws in the country to go into effect. Despite opposition from...
by Tyler James | Mar 12, 2025 | News
The Forest Grove Police Department has identified the missing children as 7-year-old Jenessa Brunk, 7-year-old Haven Hinerman, and 9-week-old Declan Hinerman. Investigators say the children were taken from their home in Forest Grove and are believed to be with their...
by Tyler James | Mar 11, 2025 | News
Update (2:45pm): Since we originally reported on the discovery of a child’s body in Siletz, the Lincoln County Sheriff’s Office has now confirmed that the remains belong to missing toddler Dane Paulsen. Dane was found deceased in the Siletz River, approximately three...
by Tyler James | Mar 10, 2025 | News
The search for 2-year-old Dane Paulsen in Siletz, Oregon, remains ongoing, with daily water searches and continued investigative efforts. The Lincoln County Sheriff’s Office (LCSO) posted an update on Facebook on March 10, 2025, detailing the latest developments. Key...
