by Tyler James | Mar 10, 2025 | News
Today marks March 10, 2025, the tenth day of the search for missing 2-year-old Dane Paulsen. The effort to locate him continues in Siletz, Oregon, with his family, volunteers, and law enforcement remaining dedicated to bringing him home safely. Dane was last seen near...
by Tyler James | Mar 9, 2025 | Humor, News, Satire
After 128 years in office, Senator Ron Wyden has announced a bold new infrastructure plan to finally address Oregon’s long-standing wagon wheel crisis. Speaking to reporters from the steps of the U.S. Capitol, Wyden promised that his long-awaited Wagon Wheel...
by Tyler James | Mar 9, 2025 | Adventures, Hiking
Ah, springtime in Oregon—a magical season when the sun teases us with its presence for exactly 3.5 minutes before disappearing behind an eternal wall of clouds. For months, you’ve been wrapped in a burrito of seasonal depression and flannel, doom-scrolling on your...
by Tyler James | Mar 9, 2025 | Humor, News, Satire
Springfield, OR – In an extraordinary act of selflessness and technical prowess, local father Greg Thompson, 47, successfully adjusted the microwave clock for Daylight Savings Time before anyone in the household even woke up. “I didn’t do it for the recognition,” Greg...
by Tyler James | Mar 9, 2025 | Food & Drink, Restaurants
Tucked away in the small town of Monroe, Oregon, Long Timber Brewing Company is more than just a microbrewery and restaurant—it’s a tribute to the region’s rich logging history and a culinary destination worth the trip. Sitting just 23 miles north of Eugene on Highway...
by Tyler James | Mar 8, 2025 | Humor, News, Satire
HEAVEN—After years of patience, countless warnings, and multiple disasters that somehow still weren’t enough to inspire change, sources close to the Almighty confirm that God is now “heavily considering” giving California a gentle push into the Pacific by 2030. “I...
by Tyler James | Mar 8, 2025 | Adventures, Humor, News, Satire
A groundbreaking new study has finally settled the age-old debate: according to a nationwide survey, most women agree that a six-inch Subway sandwich is the perfect size. Conducted by the highly respected Institute of Culinary and Statistical Research, the study found...
by Tyler James | Mar 8, 2025 | Humor, News, Satire
NEWPORT, OR — For years, coastal visitors have suspected foul play when it comes to the mysterious yet highly strategic poop splatters appearing on their vehicles after a peaceful day at the beach. Today, in a shocking and unprecedented confession, Newport’s seagull...
by Tyler James | Mar 7, 2025 | Humor, News, Satire
In a move that has both foodies and entomologists scratching their heads, Impossible Foods has announced their latest innovation: a burger made entirely from 100% ground crickets. Dubbed the Crunchy Classic, this bold new creation promises all the protein of...
by Tyler James | Mar 7, 2025 | Humor, News, Satire
A Bend landlord, known among tenants simply as “Greg,” has proudly listed his one-bedroom, one-bath apartment for a “very fair” $3,200 a month, adding that he feels “pretty generous” about the price. “I could be charging way more,” Greg said while standing in front of...
