by Tyler James | Oct 3, 2025 | Humor, News, Satire
PORTLAND, OR — Freshly mobilized National Guard troops are already filing desperate reassignment requests after their first Portland briefing included photos from the city’s notorious World Naked Bike Ride. The “emergency ride,” hastily announced on social media by...
by Tyler James | Oct 3, 2025 | Humor, News, Satire
PORTLAND, OR — Forget “Stranger Things” and “Love Is Blind.” The hottest new reality series gripping America isn’t on Netflix, Hulu, or HBO—it's the nightly Portland ICE protests, streaming live on every platform where chaos can be uploaded in 4K. With a perfect blend...
by Tyler James | Oct 2, 2025 | Central Oregon, Humor, News, Satire
BEND, OR — Despite what the calendar claims, residents say autumn didn’t truly begin until a smug Bend man in Patagonia over flannel strutted through Drake Park this weekend, clutching a $7 latte like it was the Olympic torch of fall. Witnesses describe the moment as...
by Tyler James | Oct 2, 2025 | Humor, News, Satire
PORTLAND, OR — What began as a tense standoff outside Portland’s ICE building took an unexpected turn Saturday when Antifa activists and federal troops dropped their shields, rolled out a pair of Weber grills, and transformed the protest zone into a full-blown block...
by Tyler James | Oct 1, 2025 | News, Satire
PORTLAND, OR — Portland protesters have once again raised the bar—and everything else—as they launched “Operation Full Moon,” a carefully coordinated display involving hundreds of naked skydivers raining down over the Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) building...
by Tyler James | Oct 1, 2025 | News
For Oregonian Steffenie Jenkins and her family, life changed forever when her 21-year-old son, Jacob, was diagnosed with bronchiolitis obliterans, a rare and devastating lung disease. The condition causes irreversible scarring in the lungs, making it harder and harder...
by Tyler James | Oct 1, 2025 | News, Not Satire
PORTLAND, Ore. — A routine night patrol over Portland skies turned dangerous last weekend when a U.S. Customs and Border Protection (CBP) helicopter was struck by a laser beam, temporarily threatening the safety of the pilot and crew. Federal officials say the laser...
by Tyler James | Sep 30, 2025 | Adventures, Humor, News, Satire
PORTLAND, OR — With 166 Oregon National Guard members preparing to deploy to Portland next week, locals have already begun squabbling over who will earn the honor of being the first to spray-paint “ACAB” on the side of an armored vehicle. The dispute reportedly broke...
by Tyler James | Sep 29, 2025 | Humor, News, Satire
It’s been a long time coming. After years of jokes about endless protests, artisanal chaos, and bridges that seem to exist just to get spray-painted, Portland has finally fulfilled every wild exaggeration by spontaneously detonating into a massive fireball. The city...
by Tyler James | Sep 29, 2025 | Humor, News, Satire
PORTLAND, OR — City officials are floating a bold new proposal to convert Portland’s controversial Immigration and Customs Enforcement building into an Airbnb, touting it as a potential goldmine of “luxury detention suites” and ironic tourist appeal. Under the plan,...
