by Tyler James | Jul 11, 2025 | Humor, News, Satire
SALEM, OR — In a bold new effort to “restore order and tranquility” to Oregon’s waterways, Governor Tina Kotek unveiled legislation this week that would impose a $500 fine for any “unauthorized splashing” on rivers across the state. “Too many Oregonians think they can...
by Tyler James | Jul 10, 2025 | News, Satire
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a sobering report released Thursday, leading political scientists confirmed that the only remaining path toward national unity would require a planet-destroying asteroid to obliterate all life on Earth. “After analyzing decades of data, partisan...
by Tyler James | Jul 10, 2025 | News, Satire
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Vowing to “finish what he started back when Herbert Hoover was in short pants,” Oregon Senator Jeff Merkley announced Thursday that he will seek a 13th term in 2064 at the age of 108, confidently declaring his intention to outlive every remaining...
by Tyler James | Jul 10, 2025 | Adventures
PORTLAND, Ore. (KOIN) – A Beaverton father is suing the Beaverton School District over its new digital hall pass system, warning it raises serious student privacy concerns and could create opportunities for abuse. As first reported by KOIN 6 News, Jeffrey Myers filed...
by Tyler James | Jul 10, 2025 | News
Three Oregon high school athletes and their families have filed a federal lawsuit against the state and several school districts over policies that allow transgender athletes—biological males—to compete in girls’ sports. The lawsuit, filed July 7 in U.S. District...
by Tyler James | Jul 10, 2025 | News
SALEM, Ore. — In a revelation that surprised absolutely no one who’s ever watched Oregon’s government at work, as reported by FOX 12 a new state audit has confirmed that the Beaver State might be wasting millions of taxpayer dollars thanks to a contract system that’s...
by Tyler James | Jul 9, 2025 | Humor, News, Satire
WASHINGTON, D.C. — As grocery prices soar, infrastructure crumbles, artificial intelligence begins writing its own manifestos, and World War 3 quietly warms up in the background, officials are reassuring Americans there’s absolutely nothing to worry about. “Relax,...
by Tyler James | Jul 9, 2025 | Art, Entertainment, Eugene, Events, Family Fun, Festivals, News, Things To Do, Travel, Weird Oregon
For one weekend every July, a quiet stretch of forest outside Eugene transforms into something straight out of a dream. The air fills with music and laughter, the trails come alive with costumed performers, and everywhere you turn there’s a little bit of magic. This...
by Tyler James | Jul 9, 2025 | News, Not Satire
PORTLAND, Ore. (KPTV) – You’d be forgiven for thinking this was satire, but it’s not: Starting January 1, 2026, Oregon will require a Water Access Permit for all boats on state waterways — and yes, even something as harmless as two inner tubes tied together will now...
by Tyler James | Jul 8, 2025 | News, Satire
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a press briefing that left the nation more confused than ever, President Donald Trump assured Americans that the Epstein client list was released, except it wasn’t really the list, because there is no list, apart from the list that isn’t...
