News

Welcome to our Oregon News category, where we bring you the latest and most relevant news stories from the beautiful state of Oregon. From the stunning Pacific coastline to the rugged Cascade Mountains, Oregon is home to a wealth of natural beauty, diverse communities, and exciting cultural events.

Travelers Agree: This Gas Station Port-a-Potty is a ‘Spiritual Oasis in a Plastic Shell’

In the vast, unforgiving wasteland of America’s highways—where fast food wrappers dance in the wind and gas station bathrooms look like crime scenes—one portable restroom has risen above the filth to become a beacon of hope. Perched in front of a Love’s Travel Stop, glowing under the harsh embrace...

Wife Deploys Tactical Rib Jab in Final Attempt to End Husband’s Snoring

MONROE, OR — In the early hours of Wednesday morning, local woman Emily Patterson reportedly launched what experts are calling a "precision-targeted rib jab" into the soft flank of her peacefully unconscious husband, Greg, in a final, desperate effort to end what has been described by neighbors as...

Oregon Capitol Swaps Gold Man for Dad Bod Guy Holding a Vape to Better Represent the Future

SALEM, OR — In a historic and absolutely necessary move, Oregon officials have replaced the iconic Gold Man statue atop the State Capitol with a shirtless, vape-clutching dad bod guy, a bold tribute to the future of civilization. The new statue, affectionately dubbed “Rip the Pioneer”, stands in...

Fyre Festival 2 Promises to Strand Attendees Before They Even Arrive

Fyre Festival 2 is officially happening, and organizers are promising the most authentic festival experience yet—so authentic, in fact, that attendees should expect to be stranded before they even arrive. But this time, founder and convicted fraudster Billy McFarland wants everyone to know that...

‘I’m Good for One More’: 37-Year-Old Dad of Two Boldly Orders Another Round at 10:15 PM

“I’m good for one more,” said 37-year-old dad of two, Brad Simmons, at precisely 10:15 PM, stunning his coworkers into silence. Witnesses at O’Malley’s Pub reported that the statement was made with the kind of reckless optimism typically reserved for people in their mid-20s or those who still...
Protesters Shut Down Southbound I-5, One Lane Has Reopened

Protesters Shut Down Southbound I-5, One Lane Has Reopened

In a recent development, the Oregon Department of Transportation (ODOT) has announced the temporary closure of all southbound lanes on Interstate 5 at the juncture with Eugene-Springfield Highway I-105. The cause? A group of pedestrians engaging in a protest along the...

Human Heart Shaped Rock Unearthed on Oregon Coast Sparks Wonder

Human Heart Shaped Rock Unearthed on Oregon Coast Sparks Wonder

In a unique discovery reported by KOIN news, a family from the greater Portland area found a 2-pound rock resembling a human heart in shape, color, and size on the Oregon Coast. The Ransom family discovered this rock at Short Beach near Oceanside on March 29, while...

Everything You Need to Know About Tomorrow’s Eclipse in Oregon

Everything You Need to Know About Tomorrow’s Eclipse in Oregon

In the mystical realm of the Pacific Northwest, an astronomical ballet is set to unfold under the vast, ever-shifting tapestry of the sky this Monday morning. Unlike the celestial spectacle of 2017, where the sun and moon danced in perfect harmony across the Oregon...

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