Welcome to our Oregon News category, where we bring you the latest and most relevant news stories from the beautiful state of Oregon. From the stunning Pacific coastline to the rugged Cascade Mountains, Oregon is home to a wealth of natural beauty, diverse communities, and exciting cultural events.
A local man is struggling to comprehend reality after an unthinkable event at a fast food drive-thru last night. Jacob Thompson, 34, ordered a simple meal at a nearby McDonalds, fully expecting to engage in the traditional battle of wills over condiments. But when he...
SPRINGFIELD, OREGON—Local residents can finally breathe a sigh of relief as city officials have approved the construction of two brand-new car washes, bringing the city’s already impressive total to way too many. With this latest addition, locals will have even more...
‘Telling Cars When to Stop Is a Form of Road Privilege’ Oregon has officially banned stop signs in an effort to create a more inclusive and emotionally safe driving experience. According to the state’s Department of Transportation, the word “STOP” is simply too...
In a move that shocked absolutely no one, President Donald Trump has reportedly suggested—and seemingly succeeded in—adding his face to Mount Rushmore, citing his "tremendous" accomplishments, "record-breaking presidency," and "undeniably perfect jawline." According...
Local woman Jessica Reynolds is beaming with pride after successfully keeping her car’s “Check Engine” light on for an impressive six years, setting what experts are calling a “remarkable new record in automotive neglect.” “I don’t even see it anymore,” Reynolds said,...
Residents of Pine Hollow, Oregon, barely had time to recover from the ribbon-cutting of their 7th Dollar General before town officials announced the construction of store #8—directly across the street. The decision, described by Mayor Tom Wilkins as “inevitable,” was...
In a bold and completely normal security upgrade, Tesla has officially deployed fire-breathing robot dogs to patrol its dealerships nationwide. The flamethrower-equipped quadrupeds, affectionately dubbed "CyberHounds," have already proven to be highly effective at...
PORTLAND, OR — Local couple Brian and Jessica Holloway were overjoyed to snag floor tickets to see their favorite band live, dropping a casual $1,200 for what they expected to be a magical night of music, love, and unforgettable memories. Instead, they spent the...
Oregon meteorologists have officially given up. After a week that included sunshine, rain, and snow—sometimes all in the same afternoon—local weather forecasters admitted they are now just blindly throwing darts at a weather map and hoping for the best. “Look, we...
The coastal community of Newport is coming together in support of the family of Dane Paulsen, the 2-year-old boy who tragically went missing earlier this month and was recently found in the Siletz River. As the Paulsen family navigates this heartbreaking loss, friends...
PORTLAND, Ore. — In yet another attack on the Second Amendment, Oregon’s State Court of Appeals has ruled Measure 114 constitutional, setting the stage for one of the most restrictive gun control laws in the country to go into effect. Despite opposition from...
The Forest Grove Police Department has identified the missing children as 7-year-old Jenessa Brunk, 7-year-old Haven Hinerman, and 9-week-old Declan Hinerman. Investigators say the children were taken from their home in Forest Grove and are believed to be with their...