PORTLAND, OR — In what company executives are calling their “most ambitious expansion yet,” Spirit Halloween announced Tuesday that it will seize the opportunity presented by Portland’s vacant downtown to convert every empty storefront into a seasonal costume...
News
Welcome to our Oregon News category, where we bring you the latest and most relevant news stories from the beautiful state of Oregon. From the stunning Pacific coastline to the rugged Cascade Mountains, Oregon is home to a wealth of natural beauty, diverse communities, and exciting cultural events.
GoFundMe Launched for Prineville Man Blinded in Brutal Attack by Mentally Ill Neighbor Claiming to Be a Jedi
PRINEVILLE, Ore. — A Prineville family is asking the public for help after a horrifying, unprovoked home invasion left 53-year-old Steve Wilson with devastating injuries, including shattered facial bones and partial vision loss. The suspect, a neighbor with a reported...
Report: Another Guy Gets “Unique” Forest Tattoo on Forearm
PORTLAND, OR — In a development surprising no one, another guy in the Pacific Northwest has reportedly gotten a tattoo of a forest on his forearm. Witnesses say the man, identified only as “Kyle,” emerged from a local tattoo studio Tuesday afternoon sporting a...
Jerry Garcia Back From the Dead, Oregon Country Fairgoers Blame the Edibles After Surprise Ghost Set
VENETA, Ore. — In a move that can only be described as “Grateful, Undead and Totally Unexpected,” the spirit of Jerry Garcia reportedly materialized onstage Friday evening at the Oregon Country Fair, triggering mass confusion that was blamed entirely on rampant edible...
Tina Kotek Announces $500 Fine for “Unauthorized Splashing” on Oregon Rivers
SALEM, OR — In a bold new effort to “restore order and tranquility” to Oregon’s waterways, Governor Tina Kotek unveiled legislation this week that would impose a $500 fine for any “unauthorized splashing” on rivers across the state. “Too many Oregonians think they can...
Experts Confirm Only Chance of National Unity Is If Asteroid Obliterates Planet
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a sobering report released Thursday, leading political scientists confirmed that the only remaining path toward national unity would require a planet-destroying asteroid to obliterate all life on Earth. “After analyzing decades of data, partisan...
Senator Jeff Merkley Pledges 13th Term in 2064 at Age 108, Promises to Outlive Every Republican
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Vowing to “finish what he started back when Herbert Hoover was in short pants,” Oregon Senator Jeff Merkley announced Thursday that he will seek a 13th term in 2064 at the age of 108, confidently declaring his intention to outlive every remaining...
Oregon Families Sue Schools for Allowing Biological Males in Girls’ Sports
Three Oregon high school athletes and their families have filed a federal lawsuit against the state and several school districts over policies that allow transgender athletes—biological males—to compete in girls’ sports. The lawsuit, filed July 7 in U.S. District...
Shocking Audit Reveals Oregon Wasting Millions, Who Could Have Guessed?
SALEM, Ore. — In a revelation that surprised absolutely no one who’s ever watched Oregon’s government at work, as reported by FOX 12 a new state audit has confirmed that the Beaver State might be wasting millions of taxpayer dollars thanks to a contract system that’s...
REPORT: Everything’s Fine, Experts Assure Public This Is All Totally Normal
WASHINGTON, D.C. — As grocery prices soar, infrastructure crumbles, artificial intelligence begins writing its own manifestos, and World War 3 quietly warms up in the background, officials are reassuring Americans there’s absolutely nothing to worry about. “Relax,...
The Oregon Country Fair Celebrates 56 Years of Magic in the Woods This Weekend
For one weekend every July, a quiet stretch of forest outside Eugene transforms into something straight out of a dream. The air fills with music and laughter, the trails come alive with costumed performers, and everywhere you turn there’s a little bit of magic. This...
Kotek’s New Law Says Tied-Together Inner Tubes Are Boats, Floating Without a Permit Could Get You Fined
PORTLAND, Ore. (KPTV) – You’d be forgiven for thinking this was satire, but it’s not: Starting January 1, 2026, Oregon will require a Water Access Permit for all boats on state waterways — and yes, even something as harmless as two inner tubes tied together will now...