PORTLAND, OR — City leaders and local news outlets confirmed this week that Portland’s downtown is officially “back,” citing increased foot traffic, renewed holiday shopping interest, and a thriving public yoga scene that appears to require no studios, memberships, or...
News
Welcome to our Oregon News category, where we bring you the latest and most relevant news stories from the beautiful state of Oregon. From the stunning Pacific coastline to the rugged Cascade Mountains, Oregon is home to a wealth of natural beauty, diverse communities, and exciting cultural events.
Former Oregon Gov. Kate Brown Released a Cold-Blooded Killer Who Executed a Teen Girl — Now He Sits on Salem’s Police Review Board
A convicted Oregon killer freed early by former Democratic Governor Kate Brown is now placed in a position of authority in Salem after the City Council voted to reappoint him to the Community Police Review Board. For many Oregonians the decision is not merely...
Oregon Residents Told to Stay Inside Because It’s Miserable and Stupid Outside
WILLAMETTE VALLEY, OR — City officials issued a blunt but widely appreciated advisory Wednesday morning urging residents to remain indoors after a night of relentless rain, howling wind, and power outages that left much of the valley waking up cold, exhausted, and...
Tina Kotek Says No Christmas Presents Under Tree For Anyone Opposing Her Tax Bill
SALEM, OR — Oregon Governor Tina Kotek issued a stern holiday warning this week, announcing that residents who oppose her latest tax bill should not expect to find Christmas presents under the tree this year, calling the measure “a necessary sacrifice for the greater...
Area Man Behind on Rent Says He’s ‘Treating Himself’ While Shopping at Tiny Overpriced Hippie Grocery Store
EUGENE, OR — Despite being nearly three weeks behind on rent and actively refusing to open his banking app, local man Aaron L., 34, confirmed Tuesday that stopping by a tiny, overpriced hippie grocery store was “exactly what he needed right now.” “I’ve just been under...
Kotek’s Gas Tax Jeopardy After Oregon Voters File Nearly 200,000 Signatures
A Republican-backed group has submitted nearly 200,000 signatures to Oregon election officials, a move that appears likely to block a recently approved gas tax increase and force the issue onto the 2026 ballot. The group, No Tax Oregon, turned in the signatures Friday...
Portland Clarifies River Poop Is “Different Poop” Than What Residents Dodge Downtown Daily
PORTLAND, OR — City officials moved quickly Monday to clarify that the recent release of human waste into the Willamette River is not the same poop residents routinely dodge on downtown sidewalks, stressing that while the two may appear similar, smell similar, and...
Portland Replaces Christmas Tree With Large Green Object, Calls New Holiday Display “Bold” and “Inclusive”
PORTLAND, OR — Portland officials confirmed this week that the city has officially replaced its traditional Christmas tree with a large, smooth, abstract green object, describing the new holiday display as “bold,” “inclusive,” and “a meaningful departure from...
Bend Named ‘Top Relocation Choice for Californians Who Don’t Understand Why Locals Hate Them’
BEND, OR — Bend has once again topped the charts as the #1 relocation destination for Californians who are baffled by local hostility, according to a new report from the National Association of People Who Turned One Bedroom Condos Into Retirement Plans. Researchers...
Apparently Portland Has Decided Its Christmas Tree Is No Longer a Christmas Tree
Portland’s long-running holiday tradition took on a noticeably different tone this year after city officials avoided using the phrase “Christmas tree” during the 41st annual lighting ceremony at Pioneer Courthouse Square, referring to it only as “the tree.” The...
Kotek Announces Christmas in Oregon Will Now Be Known as “Inclusive Winter Observance”
SALEM, OR — In a move that experts are calling “bold,” “innovative,” and “the most Oregon thing to ever happen,” Governor Tina Kotek announced Monday that traditional Christmas celebrations will be officially replaced statewide with a new holiday: Inclusive Winter...
Tourist Mispronounces Willamette, Immediately Deported Back to California
PORTLAND, OR — A Southern California tourist was escorted to the Oregon–California border Tuesday after loudly referring to the Willamette River as the “Will-Uh-Mah-Tee,” a pronunciation so catastrophically off-base that officials classified it as an “Immediate...











