BEND, OR — In what Deschutes County officials are calling “an immersive forest engagement experience,” a new zip line attraction has opened just outside Bend — and instead of a smooth landing, it launches riders face-first into a very large pine tree.
The ride, funded by an emergency eco-tourism grant and built in less than 72 hours, propels thrill-seekers 300 feet across a breathtaking stretch of Pacific Northwest wilderness before abruptly concluding with what designers describe as a “full-contact arboreal finale.”
“This isn’t about safety or comfort,” said project coordinator River Skye-Windwalker, gesturing toward a heavily barked impact site. “It’s about becoming one with nature. Sometimes violently.”
The attraction, unofficially nicknamed "The Final Log Off," has become a hit among adrenaline junkies and spiritual influencers alike. Participants are provided with a waiver, a helmet (upon request), and a cryptic note reading: “Brace for enlightenment.”
“I didn’t realize we were supposed to hit the tree,” said Emily Dratch, a yoga instructor from Eugene who suffered a mild concussion and a profound epiphany. “But honestly, the moment of impact really opened my third eye. And maybe a fourth one.”
The tree itself — an ancient ponderosa pine now lovingly referred to by staff as “The Embracer” — shows visible signs of frequent collisions. A small plaque at its base reads, “You’ve reached your destination. Now reflect.”
Critics have raised questions about the ride’s legality, morality, and physics.
“There’s no brake system. There’s no exit plan. There’s just a tree,” said Councilman Doug Weller, who voted against the project. “If I wanted to watch people launch themselves into wood at high speed, I’d go back to that lumberjack bar in Redmond.”
Still, Skye-Windwalker remains undeterred. “We’re redefining adventure,” he said, tightening a bolt on the pulley system made from reclaimed toaster parts. “This is more than a ride. It’s a metaphor with whiplash.”
County officials confirmed they’re already drafting plans for a follow-up attraction: a treetop slackline over a wasp nest titled “The Path Isn’t Always Clear.”
