PORTLAND, OR – Walmart has unveiled a bold new experiment in Portland, testing out cutting-edge AI-powered technology designed to combat a growing problem: tweakers. The store’s automatic doors are now equipped with advanced artificial intelligence that can detect...
News
Welcome to our Oregon News category, where we bring you the latest and most relevant news stories from the beautiful state of Oregon. From the stunning Pacific coastline to the rugged Cascade Mountains, Oregon is home to a wealth of natural beauty, diverse communities, and exciting cultural events.
HEAT WAVE: Local Dad in Fresh Kicks Fires Up The Grill As Temps in Oregon Soar Above 50 Degrees
SPRINGFIELD, OR — The scent of lighter fluid and overconfidence filled the air Friday afternoon as local dad, Greg Thompson, triumphantly wheeled out his Weber grill, declaring it "grilling season" the moment temperatures climbed to a balmy 50 degrees. Despite a...
In a Stunning Move, Mexico Follows USA’s Lead and Declares Spanish the Official Language
In a stunning turn of events, the Mexican government has officially declared Spanish as the country’s national language, following the bold example set by former U.S. President Donald Trump, who recently declared English the official language of the United States. The...
Search Continues for Portland Man Last Seen Attempting to Merge Onto I-205
PORTLAND, OR — The search for 34-year-old Kevin Michaels, who was last seen attempting to merge onto I-205 during rush hour, continues as family and friends hold out hope for his safe return. Kevin left his Southeast Portland home last Tuesday morning, reportedly en...
Portland Now Offers Authentic ‘TentBnB’ Experiences in the Heart of Downtown
Portland’s tourism board has announced an exciting new way for visitors to experience the city’s vibrant urban landscape: “TentBnB” – the ultimate authentic downtown lodging experience! For just $89 a night (or $10 if you book directly with Rick behind the 7-Eleven),...
Epstein List Drops Today After However Many Years, And It’s Totally Not Altered At All
BREAKING: The long-awaited Epstein list is finally set to be released today, and officials insist—without a single wink or nervous glance—that it is completely unaltered, totally uncompromised, and in no way missing any names that might cause billionaires to break out...
Hundreds Hospitalized After Sunlight Reflects Off Pasty White Oregonians Emerging from Winter
Hundreds of Oregonians were rushed to the hospital over the past couple of days after an unseasonably bright sun made the mistake of shining down upon the pasty, vitamin-D-deprived masses emerging from their winter hibernation. The incident, now being referred to as...
Man and His Dogs Survive Terrifying Highway 126 Incident as Falling Trees Impale Car
VIDA, Ore. — As reported by KEZI, a man and his two dogs are lucky to be alive after a harrowing incident on Highway 126 in Vida. A powerful windstorm sent trees crashing down, impaling his vehicle and leaving first responders stunned that anyone inside had survived....
Oregon’s Burning Question: Why Are We Still Ignoring Indigenous Fire Wisdom?
Recently, I revisited Cougar Hot Springs, a place I hadn't seen since my teenage years. The transformation was startling. Where once lush greenery enveloped the pools, now stood a forest of charred trees, remnants of the devastating Terwilliger Fire of 2018. The...
Man Mauled by Bear at Crater Lake, TikTok Live Ends Right When It Gets Good
It started as any other adventure vlog—Kyle, self-proclaimed "wilderness influencer" and part-time crypto enthusiast, set out on a solo trek through Crater Lake National Park in search of "epic, untouched content." Armed with nothing but his phone, a knockoff GoPro,...
Bigger, Bolder, Better: Pioneer Joe Coffee Becomes the Largest Roaster on the Oregon Coast
The Oregon Coast has long been synonymous with stunning ocean views, quaint coastal towns, and a vibrant sense of community. Now, coffee enthusiasts in Lincoln City have another reason to celebrate: Pioneer Joe Coffee Company, a family-owned business known for its...
Against All Odds: Portland Man Amazed to Find His Tesla Just as He Left It
Portland, OR – In what some are calling an act of divine intervention, local progressive and proud Kamala Harris supporter Jeremy Feldman returned to his parked Tesla Model 3 in downtown Portland on Tuesday night to find it completely intact—a statistical...