Humor

Family’s Wholesome Weekend Plans To Unplug At Lake Cabin Ruined By Lack Of WiFi

What was supposed to be a wholesome family plan to unplug at a lake cabin quickly collapsed into emotional devastation after the Miller family discovered the getaway they had been romanticizing for weeks did, in fact, require them to go without reliable WiFi. The trouble began Friday evening...

Oregon State Capitol Unveils Kate Brown Portrait In Iconic COVID Christmas Snow Globe Mask

SALEM, Ore. — Oregon officials gathered at the State Capitol Monday for the unveiling of former Governor Kate Brown's official portrait, revealing what many historians now consider the most recognizable symbol of Oregon's COVID era: the legendary Christmas snow globe mask. The portrait, which now...

PORTLAND, Ore. — In what officials are calling a major step forward for aquatic inclusivity, Oregon announced this week that all public swimming pools will be required to employ at least one certified drag queen lifeguard during Pride Month. The new program, officially known as the Aquatic...

Portland Celebrates 10 Years Of Solving Mental Health By Ignoring It

PORTLAND, Ore. — Standing alongside state and federal law enforcement partners at a packed press conference Tuesday morning, Multnomah County officials proudly announced the successful completion of Portland's ten-year strategy for addressing mental illness by doing almost nothing about it. "Today...

ODFW Confirms Sighting Of Extremely Rare Portland Seagull

PORTLAND, Ore. — Wildlife officials say they've confirmed the first documented sighting of an Extremely Rare Portland Seagull, a subspecies long believed to exist only in stories told by brewery owners, baristas, and people who somehow manage to turn every conversation into a podcast. The bird was...

PORTLAND, Ore. — In what officials are calling a major step forward for aquatic inclusivity, Oregon announced this week that all public swimming pools will be required to employ at least one certified drag queen lifeguard during Pride Month. The new program,...

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