Dear That Oregon Life: My Tesla Isn’t MAGA, I Swear—Can I Reattach the Logo Now?

by | Jun 5, 2025 | Dear That Oregon Life, Satire

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I’m writing to you with trembling fingers and a heart full of reclaimed anxiety. I need help. Not the kind of help you get from a therapist (I already have two of those), but the kind you get from a trusted Oregon-based lifestyle blog with a passive-aggressive Facebook comment section.

Here’s the situation.

In 2020, I bought a Tesla. I felt like a pioneer. I was going to save the planet—quietly, in leather-trimmed seats, with a Bluetooth podcast about regenerative mushroom farming playing in the background.

Then came… the era.

Elon started tweeting memes with Pepe the Frog. Trump called him “a good guy.” Suddenly my car felt less like a sustainable futuremobile and more like a rolling Joe Rogan episode.

I panicked.

I ripped the Tesla logos off with a compostable spork. I slapped on a “F**k Billionaires” sticker next to a “Coexist” bumper magnet and started telling people it was a European prototype only available to people who subscribed to The Atlantic.

But deep down… I always knew.

People knew. They knew. No one believed it was some mystery EV. One guy at REI said, “Nice Tesla,” and I pretended I didn’t hear him and just sprinted into the Patagonia section.

I even added an “I Brake for Bernie” decal in hopes of spiritual camouflage.

But now… things have changed.

Elon and Trump had their nasty breakup. Elon said Trump was “too clingy.” Trump said Elon owed him “half the satellites and a rocket with gold toilets.” And something inside me stirred—like a lithium battery reawakening.

So I guess my question is… is it safe now?

Can I reattach the Tesla logos? Can I stop pretending my car is “just a limited-run Rivian test unit from the Netherlands”? Am I allowed to love Elon again—or at least lowercase-like him?

I’ve even started peeling off the “Eat the Rich” sticker… but only halfway. Just in case.

Please help. My car doesn’t know who it is anymore.

Sincerely,
Ashamed in Ashland


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Written By Tyler James

Tyler James, founder of That Oregon Life, is a true Oregon native whose love for his state runs deep. Since the inception of the blog in 2013, his unbridled passion for outdoor adventures and the natural beauty of Oregon has been the cornerstone of his work. As a father to two beautiful children, Tyler is always in pursuit of new experiences to enrich his family’s life. He curates content that not only reflects his adventures but also encourages others to set out and create precious memories in the majestic landscapes of Oregon. Tyler's vision and guidance are integral to his role as publisher and editor, shaping the blog into a source of inspiration for exploring the wonders of Oregon.

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