It was a typical cloudy morning at a gas station just off I-5 in Salem, but for one Oregonian, it would become the scene of an epic rescue she’d never forget. Emily Thompson, a lifelong Portland resident and Prius driver, stood frozen in front of the gas pump, her...
In a groundbreaking post on Truth Social, former President Donald Trump announced an unprecedented partnership with legendary lumberjack Paul Bunyan and his trusty blue ox, Babe, to deliver "billions and billions" of gallons of water from the Pacific Northwest to...
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a groundbreaking announcement today, Donald Trump declared that blue hair will soon be banned across the United States in an effort to "restore national pride and patriotism." The bold initiative, dubbed the "Hair to the Chief Act," would outlaw...
PORTLAND, OR — It’s been nearly two years since Oregon officially joined the rest of the country in allowing self-serve gas, but for Gary Thurman, a 36-year-old lifelong Oregonian, the adjustment has been anything but smooth. On Tuesday, Gary pulled into a local Shell...
PORTLAND, OR — In a city famous for its love of drizzle, gloom, and perfectly damp mornings, three consecutive days of sunshine have sent locals into a full-blown existential crisis. Hundreds of Portlanders gathered downtown on Sunday to demand the immediate return of...
