Oregon offers white girls support group for pumpkin spice latte addiction

Two basic bitches sample the delights of Starbucks. Picture: Jake Nowakowski Source: News Limited

This fall, the University of Oregon is offering white girls a weekly support group to help them deal with pumpkin spice latte addiction and “their lack of control to impulsively post pumpkin spice lattes on social media.”

“The White Girl Pumpkin Spice Latte Addiction Support Group is geared towards providing white girls an opportunity to join together to celebrate their successes as well as share their struggles with pumpkin spice latte addiction” the university website explains. “White girls will gain an opportunity to deepen their resilient qualities by sharing their experiences in an open, supportive environment.”

The first example of “issues to be discussed” at the support group is “Coping with the pumpkin spice latte addiction while refusing to wear anything other than LulaRoe leggings throughout fall.”

Sure, we all know the sweet caffeinated beverage is loaded with concentrated sugar, warm frothy milk fat, and a pinch of salt to get the dopamine flowing. Most white girls already understand the health risks they face as a result of slurping down pumpkin spice lattes during the colder season. Not only do they become too fat and hinder their ability to comfortably post new years resolution gym selfies on social media, they are also at high risk of being stuck in plus size LulaRoe leggings for life.

A study out of Duke University in 2014 found that 4 in 5 white girls struggle with pumpkin spice latte addiction, and being a nuisance on social media with their pumpkin spice latte obsession is only half the problem. Some white girls have even reportedly left their man, claiming their latte provides considerably more physical and emotional support.

The support group is offered by the university counseling services and will take place every Wednesday. According to their website, the group is not only open to white girls, but basic bitches struggling with pumpkin spice latte addiction as well.

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